[CR]Re: Big Time Quandary/50th Anniv. Group Dilemma (long)

Example: Framebuilders:Rene Herse

From: <emeneff@earthlink.net>
To: <classicrendezvous@bikelist.org>
Date: Mon, 17 Oct 2005 16:52:39 -0700
Subject: [CR]Re: Big Time Quandary/50th Anniv. Group Dilemma (long)

On 10/16 Steve Leitgen posted about his anguish over whether to ride his low-number 50th Anniv. Group :
>I have Campy 50th #156 in the box. (No it's not for sale, bought it in
>84) If I sell the set, it will probably remain in the box as a
>collector set. If I keep it in the box it collects dust in my
>collection. My basic instinct is to build it and ride it. It's kinda
>valuable to do that. But Oh, the beauty of those pieces.>>
>So what should I do? Display or ride?

Steve, my heart goes out to ya' buddy, . . . you see this is clearly more than just a bunch of us old wind-bags trying to fob ourselves off as some kind of esoteric old bike-part aesthetes who deeply (too deeply!) ponder the never-ending issues of "restore vs. re-paint" on our Huffy Aerowinds, or "use or save-as-NIB" for our personal stashes of tire-savers and handlebar plugs.

Most of the time I can deal with these sorts of epic histrionic debates, (at least until the armchair Art critics start to come outa the woodwork) but here I think we have something else - a pretty clear-cut case of an OBJECT "owning" its POSSESOR. Yep Stevo, that 50th Anniv. Group OWNS YOU my friend ! OUCH !

Pally, sometimes the truth hurts but I'm just statin' the facts man ! That evil group OWNS YOU !

That group that you so anguish over will not release you from its bad juju spell until you do something so over-the-top, epic, awesome, jaw-dropping , pants -wetting SPECTACULARLY BAD TASTE with it that the various bad spirits tormenting-you-with-glee will be forever banished. Unfortunately even the exorcist that lifted the black-magic "spells" off of Freddy Maertens can't help you here. Nor will packing the display case with garlic, or any of the other common old-school remedies involving live sacrifices of Dura-Ace SIS shifters on the full-moon.

Nope Steve-o, there is only ONE way back from the abyss and that is to take that confounded group and put it smack-dab onto some sort of 1960's Muscle-Bike- Sting-Ray type deal with every possible cheesy low-rider accessory that can be clamped-on to the poor beast. It will not suffice just to build it up on a regular Stink-Ray either, no, the bad spirits are TOO strong for that, my friend. In cases like this you need to go BIG - something with a full sissy-bar behind the leopard skin banana seat, AND some sort of handlebars that are designed to look like an automobile steering wheel. (Contact Ray Homiski if you need advice) Do NOT forget to tie an old red Radio Flyer wagon as a trailer behind the Campy 50th Anniv. Muscle Bike and put a massive Ghetto-Blaster in there loudly playing some sort of appropriate music, probably a mix of The Sonics, Link Wray, MC5, and of course, Steppenwolf. Why the bales of money you rake in selling copies of your mix-tape will make the mere $2500 value of the group pale in comparison. You will surely be the toast of the 2006 Cirque AND Velo Rendezvous, no doubt winning the konkours de eleganza and best -of-show awards at both of these shindigs. The only sad faces present will perhaps be the likes of Matt Gorski and Ken Denny as they sadly wheel their various Renee Hearses and Chinelli's away with heavy hearts, as they torment themselves and wonder how they could have so missed the potential of such a fine mo-chine as the 50th Anniv. Muscle Bike. Next year it will be very interesting when they respond with their own versions featuring (Sacre Bleu !) all vintage French parts and LeFol fenders (Matt) and Bi-Valent hubs and Elefantino shifters on Ken's entry.

Now Mr. Leitgen you will have done Tullio proud ! Somewhere from way up on top of the snowy Crotch D'Aune pass his ethereal spirit will beam with joy and he will laugh heartily as he FINALLY sees someone who has broken the awful spell of JOYLESS Campy parts OVER-WORSHIP and SEMI-DEIFICATION. He can now finally rest in peace and go play bocce with Cino, Gino, and Fausto, as he wonders why it has taken so long for SOMEONE to finally see the light !

Glad I could help you out here, Steve -
Heretic and Blasphemer Michael Fabian,
San Francisco