[CR]re : Protecting Chrome short and long term - some other solutions

(Example: History:Ted Ernst)

From: <emeneff@earthlink.net>
To: <classicrendezvous@bikelist.org>
Date: Mon, 16 Jan 2006 22:56:57 -0800
reply-type=original
Subject: [CR]re : Protecting Chrome short and long term - some other solutions

Brian Blum was interested in ways to preserve chromed frames and components while stored.

While Cosmoline is good, when you need a REAL protective layer and are dealing with valooable-type bike parts, the best way to protection is a multi-layer approach.

The first layer of cosmoline is a good start. It needs to be slathered on really thick, and the vaseline-like consistency helps with the 1/4 inch or so build up you need for the base layer.

Second layer is good old Velox cloth handlebar tape, preferably in a light color. This needs to be carefully wrapped over the thick cosmoline layer in as many layers as it takes to COMPLETELY cover the object. Watch out for wrinkles ! It is helpful to rent and view the 1932 Boris Karloff film "The Mummy" during this phase.

Third layer is good old Rivendell-approved shellac, and plenty of it my friend ! Make sure you coat that tape well so it is as rock-hard and uncomfortable as on your average Riv-nut's handlebars.

The fourth layer is probably the most important. You want to slather up that shellac-soaked cotton -taped mummified Pooh-Zhow chrome UO-8 freewheel pie-plate, or maybe that irreplaceable chrome Schwinn Lee-Tour frame with a thick layer of good old rendered chicken fat. This is often referred to by it's Yiddish technical name of "SCHMALTZ". There is nothing that has ever been developed with regard to rust-protection that has ever even come close to challenging good-old Schmaltz. NASA had horrible problems with corrosion with ocean recovery of the Apollo re-entry vehicles until a wizened old engineer suggested replacing various synthetic pretenders-to-the-throne with the simple and natural protection of Schmaltz. So good was this protection that Schmaltz has quietly REVOLUTIONIZED the rust-protection world and therefore DO NOT be shy in the application of this top-coat over the aforementioned cosmoline, bar tape, and shellac. Rumors that J.P. Weigle's popular "Framesaver" product is based around Schmaltz dissolved in an aerosol solution of Manischewitz Concord Grape wine can finally be confirmed as the ingredients that have slayed the problem of rust just like David took out Goliath. Amen !

Now, you can rest easy. Your various chrome bits and bobs can sit safely for the next few centuries until your grandchildren's grandchildren decide to find out what exactly is inside that "fowl"-smelling greasy package that has been sitting out in the garage for all those eons. Then they can put it on EBAY and sell it to some crazed Japanese collector for some serious LOOT !

Finally, whatever you do - do NOT try and ingest Schmaltz ! As little as one teaspoonful has been shown to be capable of clogging arteries as large as the Trans-Alaskan pipeline. Definitely for external use ONLY !

Glad I could be of some help, here. Mike Fabian San Francisco

P.S. - It also works great for softening Brooks saddles ! Coppi's blind chauffeur, Biaggio Cavanna, suggested this and it was instrumental in ensuring Fausto's comfort during his numerous classics and TDF victories. Later on this was the secret ingredient that Ottusi used in his re-worked saddles.
>Date: Mon, 16 Jan 2006 16:03:44 -0800 (PST)
>From: brian <bbspokes@yahoo.com>
>To: Classicrendezvous@bikelist.org
>Subject: [CR]Protecting Chrome short and long term
>Message-ID: <20060117000344.25742.qmail@web33502.mail.mud.yahoo.com>
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>Message: 2
>I have been investigating solutions to protect chromed components and
>frames while stored. Is cosmoline the best solution and is it good for
>stablilizing a bike to be stored that already has some rust and >flaking
>chrome or will it just seal in the moisture?? any alternative solutions?
>I found that Cosmoline will cost about $85 for 5 quarts. Brian Blum in
>Berkeley